Diary 12/5/19

I am a grandmother to Max Atlas Stojakovic (Stow-yahk-oh-vitch), all 7.4 lbs. and 19 inches of him as of 10:11 on 12/2/19. Since he has developed chipmunk nursing cheeks, he may weigh more already. He is, of course, perfect, and he is truly a cute one, grandmother prejudice aside. It was a normal first birth in terms of length and hard work, but my daughter was a super athlete, as birthing moms are, and her husband a loving, stalwart, and supportive partner all through the long night and into the next morning. They just spent their first night in their own home as a family and my heart is full of what all grandparents say is that particular quality of love as your children become parents of the next generation. It is an everyday miracle.

I am grateful that my surgery occurred when it did so that I could get to the birthing center and walk into my daughter and son-in-law’s room to hold my grandbaby 7 hours after his birth. I was given a ride there by friends at Kendal who made it happen to support this momentous event in my life. I have joined the club of grandparents who were happy to help. I am so delighted to be a new member, and to rejoice at every step of this new family’s adventure.

Some of my new Kendal friends have never married nor wanted to, traveling the world, working hard in one profession or another, some have recently celebrated their 65th wedding anniversary, some are skyping with their great grandchildren- I am content with how my path unfurled before me as I took each step. I have been on the lookout for sorrow that Richard is not here to witness his grandson. The man he was would have been thrilled to love another male child in his family. Truthfully, he is here, ubiquitous in the steady warmth of his love, like the ever-present sun, even behind the gray winter clouds of Ohio. His presence is not only in his DNA, but simply here. I am sure I may know pangs of recognition and loss as Max becomes his own person without his grandfather. But for now, I experience that all is just as it should be.

I wish you much love and light inspired by this new star in my firmament to shine for you now and throughout the New Year.

17 thoughts on “Grandma Judi

  1. Congratulations! He’s a handsome boy. I remember my first grandchild, being there to hold him shortly after his birth. A priceless moment.

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  2. What a tiny adorable being in your arms! Richard’s spirit is carried forth in a form you can hold. What a blessed boy! What a blessed grandma! I celebrate with you. much love during these darkening days, Bonnie

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  3. Wow JUDI! Congratulations to everyone. Welcome Max! You look gloriously happy in the photograph. I am so happy for you. Love, Elaine

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  4. I can not tell you how absolutely thrilled I am to see this photograph. He is so perfect and so peaceful. He is a very fortunate boy to have a grandmother like you, and I know one day he will realize it. For now, just treasure these moments as deeply you can. My heart is filled with joy for you and for your family.

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